Why Women Always Come Last (And How to Change That)

Ever notice how everyone else seems to get your time, energy, and attention—except you?

Whether you're a stay-at-home mom, a full-time professional, or an empty nester, chances are you’ve quietly slipped to the bottom of your own priority list. You tell yourself it’s just life. There’s always someone or something that comes first: the kids, the errands, the dishes, the job.

But deep down… you know it.

We’re putting ourselves last. And we’ve gotten used to it.

The Guilt That Follows

Let’s be real—it feels selfish to put ourselves first. I know. I’ve been there.

A few years ago, I made the decision to start prioritizing me—and it wasn’t easy. It felt awkward. I kept thinking, Is this wrong? Should I be doing something else?

But then I noticed something: I was happier. I had more patience. I smiled more. I felt like me again.

You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup

You’ve heard the saying—and it’s true. When I started making time for movement, everything changed.

My mood improved. My stress decreased. And yes, even my weight shifted.

Exercise became my therapy. It’s the most underutilized antidepressant we have—and it’s free. I’ve never once finished a workout and thought, Wow, I really regret that.

“But I Don’t Have Time…”

I hear you. I used to do it all, too.

I was a compulsive cleaner. My house was spotless, every single day. But looking back, I wonder—why? No one was coming over. And I was missing out on real moments with my kids.

Now? I deep clean once a week and tidy as needed. The kitchen gets cleaned after dinner—and if I’m busy, my husband handles it. (It’s his mess too, let’s be honest!)

I’ve learned to ask for help. I’ve made chore charts. I’ve delegated. And guess what? The world didn’t fall apart.

You’re Allowed to Spend on You

For so long, I felt guilty spending money on myself.

If my kids needed $150 shoes, there was no hesitation. Name brand for them—Target clearance rack for me. But I’ve realized something important:

I deserve to be taken care of too.

This isn’t about being selfish. It’s about being well—mentally, physically, and emotionally. You are not just a mom, or a wife, or an employee. You are a whole, complete person who deserves to feel good.

Start Small, But Start

So today, I’m giving you permission (not that you need it):

• Go for the walk.

• Sign up for the class.

• Buy the thing.

• Ask for help.

• Let something go.

• Choose you—even just a little bit more.

Because when you feel better, everyone around you benefits, too.

You’re worth it.

— Shanna